The past month our ministry has been to help at a cerebral palsy hospital a few days a week. This hospital houses over 75 wheelchair-bound sufferers whose ages range from two to 35. We help with the daily tasks which include: chopping vegetables for their one meal of mush, spoon feeding them their mush, changing them, bathing them, folding mass amounts of daily laundry, and most importantly loving on them (talking, playing, holding). By working there God has softened my heart an incredible amount. He has shown me how to love unconditionally and made me appreciate all the health in my life.
One day I was helping in the rooms and Ashly, who is about three, started crying. Her cries got louder and more violent. She would lean forward in her wheelchair then use all her might to throw her head and body back against the chair. She did it over and over, each time the front wheels came off the floor. After eight or so times of throwing her head back her mouth started bleeding. There was nothing I nor the nurses could do. I just sat and watched and prayed. I wanted her so badly to realize that hitting her head was what was causing her pain and bleeding. She was just caught in this cycle. I felt so helpless. I felt like a parent watching their child do drugs and keep hurting themselves in the cycle of addiction. The amount of emotions I had was overwhelming; worry and hope, pain and love. I truly felt like a parent. It was awful. And then she stopped, and breathed, and smiled. And it was good.
Then I thought about God and what we do to ourselves. We get ourselves into debt, or drink too much, or aren’t honest to the people around us. We get ourselves into dilemmas and label them as their own; when in reality they are not. God is filled with emotions giving us opportunities to see the roots of our problems. We are all in head banging cycles. He wants us to stop, breathe, and listen. I did, and I came here. I know He is happy and rejoicing. And it is good.
